This week has been a wrenching week for me at work. The decisions have been made and the words have been said. My group is now "lighter" by three people. I'm a relatively new manager where I work -- I was promoted into the position of "Project Manger" for software development in September and I inherited a group of people. My group had its issues. What group doesn't? But that doesn't make belt tightening processes any easier. I feel good that I was able to preserve the positions of several people (which, of course, they will never know) but awful about the ones that I lost. Fortunately, on this round I was not asked to let anyone go directly (I didn't hire any of them originally, so I was spared that trauma), but it was just about the hardest thing I have ever done to tell one of my guys about the new terms of his employment, and to lead a small meeting on Friday to explain what was going on to everyone.
My dad used to joke when I was little that I was "management". And because he was an engineer (all the men in my family are engineers), I always new it wasn't entirely a complement. But on the other hand, I can't help myself. I love to organize, plan, and work with people to get a job done. Getting a PhD is almost more about learning how to plan a project and lead a group of people than it is about just doing science. I grew into my position where I am and when we are not going through this kind of crisis, I love what I do. Let me tell you -- this is the hardest job I have ever loved. I've been so excited watching my group pull together and watching some of the more reticent people participate. Making milestones and delivering good stuff is a complete rush for me. So this was a big blow to me. Not from an ego perspective, but from the perspective of watching a growing happiness be shattered. I spent most of the week sort of bleeding on the inside, knowing what was coming and not having any power to stop it. I worked hard to get the best possible arrangements for my group members, and hopefully they will never know that. And I am more committed than ever to seeing that they get to do what they are good at, and making sure we never have to go through this again.
So if you work and you have a manager you like, think a few good thoughts in their direction.
On a more positive note, I''ve decided to start reviewing the growing collection of knitting books on my shelf. I've added a new link over in my side bar to Knitting Book Reviews. There's only one review so far for Jaeger Handknits Natural Fleece JB14 but now that I have all my html templates and things in order (I love Dreamweaver! -- I have an old version, ut is still takes some of the pain out of dealing with HTML) I should be able to get them out much faster. I believe my next review will probably be one of my Alice Starmore books, but if you see anything on the list that you are curious about, let me know and I'll do that one next. I also have a collection of individual patterns that I will probably review as well, so stay tuned!
Okay... time to get back to my "Flappable Handbag". I got a second wind to work on it last night while going through the blogring and now I think I might be able to get it finished over the weekend!


















